LITTLE D

Life is sometimes unpredictable. I do not know why lately I'm too depressed with myself. My fault? Maybe I'm too far away from Allah may this part of the test. Allah may have planned the way my life better. Allah is the  first used for guided me. When I tell my life story to them, they said I was lucky meditating, when I'm alone and reflect upon myself, do I able to maintain this guidance? Too many trials, I almost collapsed. But there is a faith in my heart I will continue to get up and fight, it is not easy to defend something simple collapsing. Let them insult, let them look down. leave. God is all-knowing what is implied. Be patient, O hearts that one day success will come with full meaning.

phts & edit  by myself Alhamdulilah I'm safely arrived my destination this evening , yeah it was  long journey so do my heart  began to move away . May Allah ease me  . Bismillahirrahmanirrahim Life , it will pass us by so fast . But really , it's up to us how far our journey is and when we finally hop off . And in those moments before leaving, you must wonder , was my journey worth it in the end? . And the answer should be 'yes' . -mellifuous Said goodbye , turned around and you were gone,gone,gone . Faded into the setting  sun , slipped away. But I won't cry cause I know , I'll never be lonely .For you are the stars to me , you are the light I follow . In a place far away where the water meets the  sky The thought makes me smile Sometimes I feel my heart is breaking , But I stay strong and I hold on cause I know I'll see you again and this is not where it end , See you again

Do you know the real mean  of ' money' ? Do you know the real mean of 'love' ? Do you know the real mean  of 'family' ? I don't know what those thing real mean . What I know, those three words that when combined give a deep meaning . When you have MONEY they will LOVE you and we as a FAMILY .  I'm tired face of all this drama for 8 years . Maybe they see we  happy, maybe they see we smile, maybe they saw we laugh but they do not see the sense of frustration, tears and hatred.  Not everyone has a happy family, what use money  but not happy, what is the point if the family is not together and hated each other. what is its purpose? Does escape from all this gives them satisfaction?  I do not know when the 'big day' comes.

Alhamdulilah , I had three months to gain work experience, true. Working is  more difficult than learning. If I am given a choice, learning is an option for me. I have gathered a lot of experience, getting to know people, know the environment and responsibility. So this is my journey for my first experience working 'part-time'. The experience began in a bookstore (prefer to be untold) , at first I thought, maybe working in bookstore is not so bad, but the thought  dampened when I was working there, worse, tired and sadistic. There are divided into their department , but I was sooooo unlucky to get the magazine department . Honestly I'm not very interested in the magazine, the day I was interviewed , I may be placed as cashier but this may be my soul mate. At that time I worked in the care of my magazine  boss. But the knowledge that could be passed to me just 2 weeks. I feel myself great because I can handle a difficult  department. (wahaha)...

After three months of waiting, finally the question for ex- students of matriculation was looking forward unanswered at 12 pm today .I feel scared to know what's going to happen, whether I'm pleased or not. I never stop to pray  begging  Allah to facilitate the allegations that have been designated and set my faith and be a brave to know what was in the plan of Allah. I have already know the answered of  the question. I personally could never decipher the feeling when I see the answer is already there. Not sad. Not happy. I just don't know. Maybe this is my destiny  and maybe this is the course of my life that I want to continue . Although at  first I feel heavy heart to accept but do I have other options?. Sometimes we have no choice just the way we make decisions that distinguish it. Sometimes what we dream about things not necessarily it could be reach . Maybe this would be an extremely appropriate. I resigned. I'm pleased. I accept it with a ...

phts & edit by myself  Someone once asked me, whether I am an anti-to guy? . For them, I am different from the  other girls. Haha . It's kind of weird  question actually. Do I looks like lesbian ?  Agaga..  For me,  I was happy with the people around me,just enough and yes I been disappointed in a relationship and have a very rough time to recover it, that's why I'm afraid to fall in love again.  After a year , I be single and a year I'm try to  hide and blocking my feeling to  fall in love again . But the more I run the more I am close. Allowing a stranger present in my life and want to know more than a friend,  for me is hard to do, I want to accept him but at the same time the door remains closed my heart to accept anyone.  Will you willing to wait until I am ready ?  '' Ya Allah jika dia benar untuk ku dekatkan lah hatinya dengan hati ku , jika dia bukan milikku damaikan lah hati ku deng...

phts&edit by myself  Dear June please be lucky for me . May ? I just don't know . I've  get a job but.. now it's bring me so stressful down to earth I've  met a new friends but ... now they must go somewhere else I've new crush but .. he also go someplace He met me but... it's bring to a huge fight I've a date but ...... --------------------- It's long pause there . I just don't know what to said . Everything went well at first but then everything went wrong . And wrong and always wrong . Yeah like they said someday we'll be on top and someday we'll down beneath into the layers of the earth into how though I'm not sure. But I never felt that I would always be on top always below and below and below.. But With patience and sincerity..I  keep believing on my fate that one day, though not yesterday .. today or tomorrow .. but I still believe that one day my future is bright. I'll make it . ...

Second semester it just great, we still close each other like always, hang out, do some crazy stuff , haunting our crush again and again  . I should admit it someday I will miss my life and my friends in matriculation , yeah is really hard to met them, we from different country , some from Kedah, Peneng, Pahang , Kelantan . It's impossible  to meet again .  Since lately, too many trials happen to me, sometimes I do not know whether I'm strong  enough to face it.This is beyond my expectations  but I still gave strength to the spirit and feel that this is a test from Allah Almighty . Allah  gives trials to people who can handle it. Many  people are facing trials, massive from me, but why they can handle it with a smile, laughter, I must  be strong. One day the truth will emerge.