LITTLE D

Mungkin ramai akan cakap aku bodoh atau seumpamanya . Mungkin itu semua benar . Sungguh . Tapi aku takut .  Benarlah kata bonda semakin aku mintak jauh semakin ia menghampiri . Aku bukan menolak tapi mengelak Sungguh aku tidak layak , benar . Telah banyak aku melakukan dosa mahupun silap. Jika dosa itu berbau , akulah yang berbau paling busuk . Mungkin 1000 jauh batunya masih terhidu , atau lebih jauh lagi . Aku pernah terbaca di dalam al-quran . Ayatnya berbunyi lebih kurang (aku buat ayat sendiri) ''Kalau kau buat salah mintak ampun pada Allah , jika kau buat salah lagi mintak ampun pada Allah dan jika kau mengulangi lagi mintak ampun pada Allah , sesungguhnya Allah maha pengampun '' Hati aku sentap , sudah berjuta kali aku membuat kesilapan dan kesalahan yang sama namun Allah masih menerima . Aku pernah berjanji dengan diri aku sendiri namun aku tetap melakukan . Betapa hinanya aku . Mungkin luaran atau mata kasar orang melihat aku baik...

Time passes so quickly. It's time I returned to sintokoyo, tomorrow morning. Goodbye home Yesterday , I do have a really great time with my roommate and my course  mate . I wish Farah can join us  it will be more fun .So yesterday we gathered at KL central. I'm from Putrajaya while those in KL. This is the first time we went out together in the KL area and we do have fun time . Let's hang out again someday . Okay , let me tell a bit about them, know where you deign to make future wife? okay jokes. This akak Yas, why akak ? her  age  is 20, but she does look like 20 right ? Maybe she is too small , yeah I am fat .  STPM leavers in  accountants course . Fantastic. Ever she  given a bid to continue her studies in accountants at Australia  but she rejected the offer because delayed until after she was in sintokoyo. Maybe in sintokoyo is akak sustenance.I am happy to get to know you. She was also one of the reasons we like to bully her, becaus...

Perhaps here the fate I know who I am. I never thought that I would be this level. I had hoped to have a life like everyone else or be in their place. They are full of life and  full of happiness. It's time I stop complaining, I have to move forward. Dare I gotta move. I'm very grateful for what I have experienced. I never thought I would spend the night in the forest. I never thought I can fight with them I never thought  I'm brave to fight their challenges. I did not expect. And I'm proud of myself . Farah buat cerita seram lak time ni  Tengah makan mala dekat dewan  terbuka then  Farah : Apa didy?  Me: Apa? Farah : Didy ajak lepas makan ni duduk dalam khemah erk? Me: Ha mana ade Farah : ouh okay , orang belakang kot . Continue her meal  I am looking at Yas and Yas looking at me . Staring each other without knowing the answer .  “Stop comparing where you’re at with where everyone else is. It doesn...

Who knows it just a doa'  '' Ya Allah betulkan kau pandang aku lagi , Ya Allah betulkah kau sayang aku , Ya Allah jika benar tolong la hamba-mu ini , aku betul-betul nak berubah tapi aku tak tahu macam mana nak mulakan , Amin'' Who knows it just a first step with a heavy heart  'Selamat Datang ke Matrikulasi Pulau Pinang '  Who knows it just a short conversation  Me : Ehh kita satu practicum kan?  Maziah : Ha'a Me: Jom la pergi class sesame, meh la masuk bilik kita Maziah : ouh okay Me : Name sapa erk? lupa laa.. Maziah : Maziah . Who knows it just a discussion group  Afiqah : Nak number boleh , senang nak contact nanti . Me : Alaa , tak ingat la number , jap erk . Name?  Afiqah : Afiqah  Who knows it just sitting position side by side Who knows we become closer and closer  Who knows it gonna be a changes  Me : Wei kau perasan tak ? hewhew Maziah : Perasan Me : Apa-apa ? hehe...